When people ask me if I would ever try weed or some next level drugs? I would say no but it’s not because I don’t want to have fun or I’m scared of it. It’s more like is it worth trying? I think it’s important to let loose sometimes but we need to know when to say no. Everything you do all accumulates at the end, no matter how small it is. What’s so funny is that in that moment, we don’t realize it. We would just say, “oh it won’t make a difference” but here’s the thing, the more we say it, the more it’ll affect us in the future. All our decisions and actions make a difference whether it’s positive or negative. It’ll make a difference before you know it. It sucks but that’s life. It’s like a domino effect.
Sometimes I wish I was a kid again because kids are so naive in the most positive way. They don’t know anything and that’s what makes them so precious and delicate. I don’t say it as a bad thing but as a good thing. I’m an adult and I can tell you a million thoughts that run through my head every single day. There isn’t a day where I don’t think about everything like literally everything. There is a certain beauty of being an adult but there’s also a certain weakness. I remember hearing this statement, “only children can go up to heaven”. They can go to heaven because they are clueless and they don’t have their own thoughts. Now, don’t interpret it as a bad thing but think of it like this: they are always happy (most of the time) and they are just here to have fun. As we grow older, we learn more but that doesn’t mean we are learning for the greater good. Some of the things we’ve picked up can cause us to think unholy thoughts like stealing someone’s wallet or plotting revenge on your enemy or doing drugs which leads to other things. It might seem small but that’s what differentiate us from children. Sure, they might cry or complain they don’t like someone but they don’t have the intelligence to come up with these adult-like ideas. Their actions aren’t going to cause another bad thing to happen; it won’t lead to another thing.
You can say I’m like a child when it comes to weed or drugs or even alcohol (maybe i shouldn’t have told you guys but like come on it’s a no brainer). I don’t want to touch it or experience it because I don’t want to start having unholy thoughts or start doing things that are not morally right for me. I want to be pure as possible and be like a kid. It might sound kinda weird or even stupid to think like that because some people might say that it’s important to learn about them so that you know what’s “safe” and what’s not. But why do you need to know about them if you know you’re never going to touch it or use it? It’s not just drugs or alcohol but it applies to our daily life. Sometimes it’s better not to know than to know. Knowledge gives us so much power but too much can do us harm. It’s like one puff of weed is not that bad but too much of it is bad.
There’s this quote from the Fault in our Stars that I’ve come to fully understand it and it’s: “It’s a metaphor. See: you put the killing thing right between your teeth but you don’t give it the power to do its killing” (Augustus Waters). It’s a very simple quote which has a lot of meaning to it. In simple words, just don’t be stupid with your decisions but in a more complex way to think of it is that we all have the ability and the freedom to choose what we want and what we don’t want. In a way, our future is in our own hands. A decision has many pathways that lead other pathways. What we choose today affects the next day.”Today’s regret is from yesterday’s mistakes” We can’t live a perfect life but we have the option to live a better life today. No one knows when you’ll die or when the world ends but if we can live everyday to the fullest and make the wisest decisions then we’ve done enough. Yes, life is too short and we should try things but are those things worth it? Would it cost you? That’s the question. There are some things that are not worth it but that’s up to your own discretion. Every decision we make will lead to the next thing. It has consequences. Can you bare these consequences?
Lots of Love,
Heidi 💜💜
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